Astarion has breached the Vatican—Baldur's Gate 3 has sold 2 copies in Vatican City, says Larian's director of publishing
The Vatican now has exactly two Baldur's Gate 3 copies being played inside its hallowed walls, according to Larian's director of publishing, who took to X today to share his findings. This marks a second notable instance of gaming behaviour by the Catholic Church this year, as in July, it ordained its first gamer saint.
"Sold 2 copies of Baldur's Gate 3 in The Vatican, with 1 wishlist," writes Michael Douse. "I'd like to think the latter is just the Pope waiting until he has a free minute. Wish I could see their mod list. Bet it's absolutely gnarly."
While two copies doesn't sound like a whole lot, it's important to remember what Vatican City actually is— a 121-acre patch of land in Rome that's its own sovereign entity, and the seat of the Catholic Church. It has a population of about 764, half of which don't even live in the place. Just over 100 of that number includes the Papal Swiss Guard.
To put it in perspective, if you added The Vatican City to a homicide rate chart, which typically measures it in deaths per 100,000 people by homicide in any given year, it displays a homicide rate of 256 in 1998, when three people were found killed.
Consequently, the percentage of people in The Vatican City playing Baldur's Gate 3—if the statistics aren't lying—just jumped up by 0.2%. Or, if we wanted to go by the method mentioned above, around 261 out of 100,000 Vatican City residents are Baldur's Gate 3 players. Eerily close to that 1998 homicide rate. A coincidence? Yes, obviously.
There's also every chance that a member of the aforementioned Swiss Guard has been enjoying Baldur's Gate 3 in their downtime. Still, there's something weirdly pleasing about a game based on D&D, which endured a massive satanic panic in years gone by, being merrily and uneventfully played by someone at one of the world's most religious sites without setting anything on fire. Just… try not to think about the bear sex thing, Leviticus 18 doesn't forbid making a Constitution save, but it definitely forbids that.