The pets of PC Gamer

And now, a moment to acknowledge some important colleagues at PC Gamer. Plentiful source of joy and distraction though they are, for the last year-plus our pets have doubled as our officemates amid innumerable virtual meetings, review sessions, and been shoulder to shoulder (or nose to ankle, at least) with us as we covered big moments like E3. Please join us in celebrating their contribution.

Name: Gizmo
Age: Probably 8 or 9
Favorite game: Speedrunning doggie toy destruction
Pet of: Steven Messner, Senior Reporter

Gizmo is a mix-breed rescue and possibly the gentlest—yet most energetic—dog I've ever met. His favorite thing on earth is outrunning cars (not chasing them), so we take him to a park that borders a busy road and just watch him try to race cars. It's hilarious. He's very sweet and also has awful anxiety. Thunderstorms, weird noises, this one vent in our living room, the sound of our fancy fire alarm talking to us—there's no end to all the horrors this world inflicts on my poor pup. But he's also my stalwart companion and always has to be laying next to me when I'm working or gaming.

Name: Batman
Age: 9
Favorite game: Fetch, Chase, World of Pawcraft
Pet of: Tim Clark, Brand Director

Batman has been Tim's constant gaming companion through years of Destiny 2 grind and Hearthstone ladder climbing, offering his support in the forms of farts of varying pungency and snoring that's invariably audible over Discord. He can be relied on to demand to go out to take a leak just as you hit the final DPS phase on a tricky raid boss. Side note: Batman hates VR because it means you're not looking at him.

Name: Fred & Barney
Age: 7
Favorite game: Barking at the postman
Pet of: John Strike, Art Ed

Fred and Barney are black and tanned long haired miniature dachshunds, more commonly known as sausage dogs. They’re best buddies from the same litter—we went to buy one and ended up with two. They enjoy chasing pigeons, barking at the television, eating the occasional cat turd (formerly cat food) and humping draft excluders.

Name: Bin Cat 
Age: ???
Favorite game: Screaming
Pet of: Someone down the road from Nat Clayton, News Writer

We don't have a pet, but I do have a procession of neighborhood cats I've gotten very familiar with. The best of these is a loud rascal wot sits on top of one of the communal bins, screaming at folks until you give him a pet or tummy rub. Bin Cat's basically a local celeb, and I'll always stop on the way back from the shops to give 'im a scritch, scream back at his constant meow, and let him follow me back up the road.

I think his real name is Fluffy, but that's a boring name for a cat.

Name: Lumi
Age: 1.5
Favorite game: Keep-away, Star Wars: Knights of the Old Repuplic
Pet of: Evan Lahti, Global Editor-in-Chief

Lumi (Finnish for "snow") is a suspected Dalmatian-Whippet mix that we rescued last year after moving to Michigan. He enjoys all the clichéd dog activities, except barking, which we very much appreciate. Lumi isn't a big PC gamer, but he holds the high score in real-life Whack-a-Mole in our rural backyard. Like the fabled sarlacc, he also likes digging a giant sand pit and lying in it.

Name: Boo 
Age: 10
Favorite game: Shed by Daylight
Pet of: Phil Savage, UK Editor-in-Chief

My girlfriend's Honduran milk snake is actually a big fan of PC gaming—specifically of the heat it produces. When she isn't basking against some vents, she's showing off her mastery of the stealth genre—usually disappearing into some small, hard to reach cranny behind the radiator. You've not truly played hide and seek until you've attempted to track down six feet of missing snake.

Name: Hopper
Age: 6 months?
Favorite game: Wheel 
Pet of: Jacob Ridley, Senior Hardware Editor

Hopper likes to run really fast on her wheel and thus has no time for petty PC games. She is, however, named after famous computer scientist Grace Hopper, so there's something of a PC gaming link in there. Hops is also the sister of Katie Wickens' hammie, Zwicky. They no longer live together because, while she may be small, Hops is tremendously angry and had to be forcibly removed from the family homestead. Tragic.

Name: Colin
Age: 10
Favorite Game: Paperboy (1985)
Pet of: Stevie Ward, Community Manager

Colin is a slightly grouchy Jack Russell-Chihuahua-Corgi mix. A professional to the end, Colin works hard and plays harder. Colin has over 6,500 facebook friends.

Name: Foxy
Age: 8 months
Favorite game: Sleeping Dog
Pet of: Harry Shepherd, Guides Editor

Any moment not spent dozing in one of her several beds, chewing, and vacuuming her food bowl is a wasted one, in Foxy's view. She's a mix of all sorts. German Shepherd, Collie, St. Bernard; people have guessed them all. She especially loves the guides section of the magazine. I just happened to find her on these pages for this totally candid snap.

Name: Robert
Age: Hard to say
Favorite game: Rocket League
Pet of: Tyler Wilde, Executive Editor

Robert reproduces asexually through rhizomes, so his age is difficult to judge. In a sense, he's as old as his lineage, which must be very old indeed. In another sense, he's a plant I got from Home Depot last month. Like other Dracaena trifasciata and certain Rocket League teammates, Robert is slightly toxic and doesn't do much. 

Name: Riley
Age: Like 6
Favorite game: Kicking her little legs
Pet of: Morgan Park, Staff Writer

Riley is a cat that my partner found on her doorstep sneezing and wheezing like a little helpless dweeb. We took her in, treated her cold, and now five years later she's my arch nemesis. When she's not ambushing my ankles in the hallways, she's waiting for the perfect moment to jump onto my desk and slap her paws all over the keyboard. She has paused videos, added countless spaces to paragraphs, and left piles of hair behind that could form its own tiny cat. I like to believe she lashes out because she wants to use my PC but can't until I go to sleep.

Name: Mika
Age: 4
Favorite game: Doggo Elysium
Pet of: Jody Macgregor, Weekend/AU Editor

A rescue dog who is half kelpie, but also part labrador/border collie/mystery hound. Mika enjoys chewing, licking, staring at cats, putting one paw on the laptop as a way of saying "pay attention to me, not that turn-based strategy game," posing for Instagram, and celebrating the survival of a bath by finding the most substantial turd he can, and rolling in it.

Name: Maze and Bruce
Age: 6 and 12
Favorite game: Grim Dawg
Pet of: Andy Chalk, US News Lead

This is Maze, on the left, and Bruce on the right. Bruce is 12 years old, weighs eight pounds, and is blind and surly. Maze is half his age, twice as dumb, and wants nothing from anyone but constant attention and approval. I mean, constant. She is a boxer/bulldog cross; he is very small. Maze loves Bruce. Bruce hates Maze.

Name: Kabuki
Age: 6
Favorite game: Mario Kart Live: Home Circuit
Pet of: Graeme Meredith, Video Producer

Descended from a long line of London street cats, Kabuki enjoys eating literally anything, including sharp objects, electrical wire or other items that could kill him more or less instantly (he would eat the dice in this picture given the chance). Besides overworking his own jaws of death, he also enjoys watching high contrast games on the TV, like Splatoon or Wipeout—messing with people while they play VR is also a good laugh for him. But as he gets more middle-aged Kabuki is settling into a nice lap cat routine (finally) which makes it easier to keep him alive a bit longer.

Bonus clip of Kabuki playing Super Mario Bros. 3 as a kitten.

Name: Max
Age: 10
Favorite game: Stealing socks
Pet of: Fraser Brown, Online Editor

Max is an Australian labradoodle and might actually be two dogs. One is a pampered French prince, lazing around and judging everyone with his oddly melancholic eyes. The other is a shaggy goof who loves stealing socks and getting absolutely filthy. He actually had a short-lived career as a game critic, helping me review the rubbish Call of Duty: Ghosts. He liked the dog but hated everything else, and never played another videogame again. These days he mostly fluctuates between complete indifference and outright jealousy when I'm playing something.

Name: Sonny
Age: 6
Favorite game: DragonBall FighterZ
Pet of: Jorge Jimenez, Hardware Writer

Having been featured on the site before, Sonny is no stranger to the glitz and glamor of being an internet celebrity. This pure-breed Rat Terrier is spoiled beyond belief and runs our household with an iron paw and is often accused of being an emotional terrorist, mostly by me. This part-time dog model has his own limited-release calendar titled Sonny All Year. He also mains Yamcha in DragonBall FighterZ, which should tell you enough.

Name: Luna
Age: 7
Favorite game: Fat Princess
Pet of: Mollie Taylor, Trainee News Writer

Luna is like the little sister I never wanted or asked for. She's a bit of a diva who loves screaming me awake at 6 am on a Saturday morning and refuses to do absolutely anything without being bribed with food, but I wouldn't have her any other way. She doesn't really do PC gaming, because that requires making some form of movement and also being awake—two of her least favourite things. I named her after Usagi's cat in Sailor Moon, but she only really responds to the words "cat," "chicken" and "bedtime."